It's All In Your Head

(TW selfharm) My head hurts so bad. All day, every day. And no one understand how much it hurts.They think I am over exagerating. There had been a doctor, a specialist in otolaryngology, that found out my pain was real. But he said he couldn’t do anything, I had to see other specialist. My mom only think is my fault, because I gnash and grind my jaw to relief a bit and that had caused dental problems, and that it will go away with time. But it hurt so bad,so I cut,because the pain take away for a bit.idk what to do,this pain is ruining my life,i can’t sleep,i got depressed,i started to cut,i want this to stop.i already talked with my family doctor,but he do not belives me,he thinks i am a fool because i am only 16, i started taking vitamins, but when i take them i feel like i can’t concentrate or think.i keep saying to my parents that my head hurts so bad. they forget it always. what can i do? i can’t take this anymore

I’m sorry to hear you’re in so much pain dear. I’m so glad you’re reaching out though. I encourage you to find some way to talk to the specialists again and have them talk to your parents to let them know that your pain is real and should be taken seriously. We’re not professionals in this so I strongly encourage you to find someone who can both tell you more about your pain and give you resources to cope with it.

You are not a fool and you are not at fault for this. I grind my teeth too to the point that my jaw pops and hurts but it’s completely different from a headache. Perhaps have your dentist explain this to your mother? You don’t have to go through this alone. The fact that a specialist has already said your pain is real is significant. To me, I think that means that there should be somebody who can help you.

I encourage you to go through our helpful resources section and look at the alternatives to self harm. You are only putting the pain back into your own body this way. If you want to talk more, we’re here for you. I’m sorry it took a little bit to get to your question. 

- Safet

 Ive noticed a few folks asking about when to seek medical treatment, and concerns about being committed against their will. I live in Georgia, and my experience has been that the ER you check into DOES NOT WANT to keep you there or hold you against your will. If you specifically ask to stay they will let you, usually for less than 24 hours. If you explicitly state a plan to harm yourself or someone else they are legally obligated to keep you for 12 to 24 hours depending on how you behave. The most common response is to get you patched up, refer you to a therapist (you usually get a list of local, inexpensive ones) and prescribe an anti-anxiety medication with no refills.  

If you think you need medical attention, your best bet is to seek it. You do not have to tell the staff why or how you got hurt. You cannot be held against your will for refusing to disclose information. Read over any paperwork before you sign it, in case the hospital you’re visiting has unique procedures that differ from the state standard of “stitch & release”. 

This is only my personal experience. I have no clue what other states and countries do, I just wanted to share this and encourage anyone to seek medical help. Having to spend a night in a hospital can really suck, but untreated self harm can lead to infections and lasting damage. 

Re: Mental illnesses as disability: Yes, they are covered under the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA), thus why schools are required to provide reasonable accommodation. Workplaces would have to do the same as well. If severe enough, you could also qualify for Social Security Disability Insurance.

Hi MiM, what if there are certain people who really trigger me, for no apparent reason that I’d want to explain? Like someone I have to deal with every day in my community.  I try to be friendly with this person, but they make me very uncomfortable.  Today, they  told me I’m confusing.  I swore at them.  I don’t ever want to talk to them again; I’m done.  People think I’m angry and have concerns about me.  I don’t know how to keep away from people who trigger me and not have a problem where everyone ends up thinking I’m “angry” or “violent.” In my reality, the people who trigger me make me feel scared, which makes them seem violent, and me seem scared.  Not sure what to do? Seems like there’s a stigma developing against me?

Hi there. I’m answering this as a post because im honestly not sure how to answer a submission…hmmm.

Ok anyway, I think that it’s a good first step for you to identify your triggers and who triggers you, but unfortunately, we can’t always completey avoid triggers. we have to learn to live with them. This sounds like the situation you are in.

You may be coming across as angry even when you’re not. The best you can do is try to explain your sitaution and how you’re feeling to them so that they can help you. Just them knowing will be a first step. It’ll help with your feelings of stigmatization if people understand.

Are you getting help and support like from therapist or doctor. It’s important that we learn skills to help cope with and live with our triggers so we dont have to avoid living our life out of fear. That’s not a good way to live. you’re stronger than your triggers. It’s really important that keep fightting them and know how to work with them.

Good luck. you’ve taken the first step already, just identying them. Now you can work on them. I’m not saying it will be easy but it will be worth it.

-lina

Submission for the anonymous person asking about PTSD:

I’ve been through the same things as you, and have been diagnosed, and I wanted you to know that while crowds, slamming doors, and tight spaces weren’t a part of my abuse they are all triggers for me. I think it’s completely normal. It goes along with that sense of losing control that is so much a part of PTSD. I’m here if you would ever like to talk to me about it as well. Things have gotten better for me since I’ve been in therapy.. and I hope they will for you too. Best.

I was prescribed this a few months ago to help with my anxiety and nightmares due to PTSD. The headaches and dizziness went away after a good month or so and it really does help me with the physical symptoms of anxiety like less of a racing heart, and the weird not being able to breath thing that comes with my anxiety. Not so much on helping with the nightmares though. Good luck on finding something that works for you! 

Mental Illness Mouse
Top text: Depression Subsides

Bottom text: Anxiety Comes Back Tenfold

There is no winning.

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2013/05/depression-part-two.html

She finally updated 8 hours ago! I’m so glad that she’s back, everyone was so worried about her…

I stayed in the adolescent psych ward for about two and a half weeks last year in March for suicidal tendencies and I want to share my experiences! it’s gonna differ from hospital to hospital (some of my wardmates were transferred from elsewhere), but yeah, generally there’s a set schedule for every day for activities, group sessions, and free time. since I was in the adolescent unit we also had school/academic on weekday mornings. we’d watch a consolidated news report first thing each day then move onto group (or individual) school activities depending on grade level (I was the oldest in the unit, 18 at the time, so I usually did my own thing). the hospital also provided us with gym time! and on days when we didn’t have gym time scheduled in, we could go to the gym during free time anyhow if enough of us in the ward wanted to go. every now and then you could get also called out of an activity to talk to your doctor/psychiatrist one on one about progress and/or if something was happening, and you could always ask the nurses to schedule a meeting if you wanted to talk to them about anything.

it might have been just my particular hospital but I actually sort of came to enjoy my time there; being around people of my own age with similar problems and being able to talk about it openly during sessions was great! if you’re willing you can make friends and build relationships with your wardmates, no matter how crazy that sounds. you do get tired after a while because it’s rather monotonous and we were not allowed off our floor, so I got super eager to get out after about a week and a half, heh. 

To the anon asking about hospital stays, the hospital may write off some, if not all of the charges. I had a $14,000 bill for a 3 day stay and the hospital completely wrote it off since my insurance didn’t pay for it. I didn’t even have to fill out any paperwork because I stayed in the psych ward. What’s more important though is getting the help you need.