It's All In Your Head

Check out my suicidal prevention letter, hope it helps (: http://dearterroristproject.blogspot.com/2013/05/dear-suicidal-person.html

(TW selfharm) My head hurts so bad. All day, every day. And no one understand how much it hurts.They think I am over exagerating. There had been a doctor, a specialist in otolaryngology, that found out my pain was real. But he said he couldn’t do anything, I had to see other specialist. My mom only think is my fault, because I gnash and grind my jaw to relief a bit and that had caused dental problems, and that it will go away with time. But it hurt so bad,so I cut,because the pain take away for a bit.idk what to do,this pain is ruining my life,i can’t sleep,i got depressed,i started to cut,i want this to stop.i already talked with my family doctor,but he do not belives me,he thinks i am a fool because i am only 16, i started taking vitamins, but when i take them i feel like i can’t concentrate or think.i keep saying to my parents that my head hurts so bad. they forget it always. what can i do? i can’t take this anymore

I’m sorry to hear you’re in so much pain dear. I’m so glad you’re reaching out though. I encourage you to find some way to talk to the specialists again and have them talk to your parents to let them know that your pain is real and should be taken seriously. We’re not professionals in this so I strongly encourage you to find someone who can both tell you more about your pain and give you resources to cope with it.

You are not a fool and you are not at fault for this. I grind my teeth too to the point that my jaw pops and hurts but it’s completely different from a headache. Perhaps have your dentist explain this to your mother? You don’t have to go through this alone. The fact that a specialist has already said your pain is real is significant. To me, I think that means that there should be somebody who can help you.

I encourage you to go through our helpful resources section and look at the alternatives to self harm. You are only putting the pain back into your own body this way. If you want to talk more, we’re here for you. I’m sorry it took a little bit to get to your question. 

- Safet

 Ive noticed a few folks asking about when to seek medical treatment, and concerns about being committed against their will. I live in Georgia, and my experience has been that the ER you check into DOES NOT WANT to keep you there or hold you against your will. If you specifically ask to stay they will let you, usually for less than 24 hours. If you explicitly state a plan to harm yourself or someone else they are legally obligated to keep you for 12 to 24 hours depending on how you behave. The most common response is to get you patched up, refer you to a therapist (you usually get a list of local, inexpensive ones) and prescribe an anti-anxiety medication with no refills.  

If you think you need medical attention, your best bet is to seek it. You do not have to tell the staff why or how you got hurt. You cannot be held against your will for refusing to disclose information. Read over any paperwork before you sign it, in case the hospital you’re visiting has unique procedures that differ from the state standard of “stitch & release”. 

This is only my personal experience. I have no clue what other states and countries do, I just wanted to share this and encourage anyone to seek medical help. Having to spend a night in a hospital can really suck, but untreated self harm can lead to infections and lasting damage. 

Re: Mental illnesses as disability: Yes, they are covered under the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA), thus why schools are required to provide reasonable accommodation. Workplaces would have to do the same as well. If severe enough, you could also qualify for Social Security Disability Insurance.

Mental Illness Mouse
Top text: Depression Subsides

Bottom text: Anxiety Comes Back Tenfold

There is no winning.

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2013/05/depression-part-two.html

She finally updated 8 hours ago! I’m so glad that she’s back, everyone was so worried about her…

I have an anecdote on the whole self diagnosis thing, take from it what you will. My dad has Seasonal Affective Disorder. Since I was 12ish I’d get very depressed in the winter; so I thought, of course, that I had the same thing. When I finally saw a doctor about it he put me on antidepressants and it was hell. I don’t have SAD. I have bipolar. I never thought anything of my highs and just thought I got more depressed than my father in the winter. Of course I only sought treatment when the depression was at a peak. I couldn’t remember ever being happy. If I had really thought about it during a point of stability I may have been more insightful, but maybe not. 

I also have that kind of deja vu where something is happening and I feel I have lived this before and I feel I know what is about to happen even though I know I can’t see the future.

I had a timetable set up to do lots of my uni work, but I’m not able to stick to it. Even with no distractions I will just sit there in a daze sometimes. I usually leave stuff to the last minute b/c I feel I work better under pressure, but I want to get this work done, some of the work I’m clueless even what to do & that depresses me, cuts off my motivation and I just can’t face doing it. I’m in my last year at uni so I also have a dissertation to write before mid-may. I need help, but uni wont help me in the way I need help, b/c we are supposed to do it on our own, the lecturers are just there to lecture.

I have lost all motivation for uni; I just want it to be over. All this year I’ve been judged by my new classmates for having low grades, being the bottom of the class, just scraping by, I’m fed up of it. I want it to end. I have no self worth, I’m useless, and I’m all alone. People don’t reply to my messages, asking for help, trying to talk. My parents don’t understand, if I say anything which could upset them in the slightest they get upset, yell at me like it’s my fault they raised me the way they did. It’s my fault that the 15+ years of being bullied throughout most of my entire life since I was like 7 has changed me from a “happy, nice girl” to a “vindictive, lying, evil bitch” (yes those are actual words used to describe me by so-called friends and my parents). I’m useless and can’t escape my parents at all.

I’m stuck in the no experience, no job cycle, I have no money to go anywhere or seek professional help. I’m worthless and all the coping techniques don’t help I need someone to physically be there with me, physically helping me to do the uni work, someone who actually understands from experience how to do it. I can’t think straight anymore, I just want to give up and cry until I die.

Sorry.

~~~

Anon, first of all I would like to apologize for taking so long to get to your message- our ask box was backed up, but that doesn’t mean that we won’t or can’t try to help you. 

Motivation to do schoolwork is hard to come by, I know, and there’s not a whole lot I can say or do that can magically make you want to do all of your work. There are a few strategies, however, that might make it a little bit more bearable:

Don’t take on more than you can handle. You’re going through a hard time right now and the most important thing is your mental health. So until you feel like you can do more, don’t take on anything that isn’t totally necessary. Also, split it up into sections- a huge paper is a lot less daunting when done over a few days than when you’re scrambling to finish it three hours before it’s due. I know you said you work better under pressure, but if you can spread it out it might be a lot less stressful. That said, if you fall behind don’t beat yourself up- everyone has days where they can take a break.

You mentioned that your school won’t help you, but try looking for some guidance again. Even if your professors aren’t helping you out, search in other places. Ask students in your classes what they’re doing- maybe even form a study group for a class that you’re struggling in. New of confusing things are always a little less scary if you’ve got a group of friends to go through them with. So try and find some friends (or make new ones) who would be willing to work with you and help you out.

Anon, you are not useless or worthless. You may be having trouble in school right now, but you’re almost done with the year and you can power through these last couple of months. And even if you have no money, there are still ways to get help. Schools often offer counseling services, and I don’t know where you live but you might be able to find a way to get therapy or medication cheaper- for example, free clinics. 

You can get through this, I believe in you ♥

-Sarah