It's All In Your Head

onlinecounsellingcollege:

A large number of people have never been taught how to successfully manage their emotions. Because of this, they repress how they feel or they engage in a range of unhealthy behaviors – from substance abuse to outbursts of rage. However, expressing our emotions in a balanced, healthy way is the most appropriate way of managing our feelings.

Below are some instructions to help you with this.

1. First, recognize the importance of acknowledging your feelings and expressing them in a healthy, open way. Buried, unexpressed emotions are usually damaging and lead to a multitude of problems in the end. For example, repressed hurt and anger lead to ongoing problems with sadness, depression or anxiety.

2. Learn to label the emotions you are battling. Many people can’t acknowledge any negative emotions – or they only have permission to express certain ones (depending on what’s allowed in their family or home). Hence, they cry when they’re angry, or get angry when they’re hurt, or they trivialise their heartache and act likes it a joke.

3. Decide that you’ll confront and try and deal with your emotions, instead of ignoring or denying how you feel.

4. Understand … expressed emotions usually dissipate in time whereas those which are repressed will usually linger and do damage.

5. Express emotions in a manner that is safe and constructive – such as going for a walk, or encouraging the tears. If you can “wallow” for a while then you will usually feel much better … but then pick up the different pieces and move on with your day.

6. Seek healing for deep wounds. You need to open up the wound and let the cleansing pain bring healing so a healthy scab is formed, and you can truly live again. Time isn’t the great healer – you need to work through all that pain.

7. Don’t forget how to laugh – look for humour in the dark days. It will help disperse the sadness, and will ease the pain inside.